| « | August 2025 | » | | 日 | 一 | 二 | 三 | 四 | 五 | 六 | | | | | | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | | | | | | | |
|
公告 |
| 暂无公告... |
| Blog信息 |
|
blog名称:
日志总数:6
评论数量:1
留言数量:0
访问次数:33893
建立时间:2005年4月17日 |
| |
|
 Happiness and the Single Person; Changing Myth Into Reality
文章收藏
rathang 发表于 2007/2/8 20:37:55 |
| Does the expression "single and happy" sound like an oxymoron to
you? Are you weary of others (especially other singles) reinforcing the
belief that singles cannot be happy? Do you find yourself always
planning for the future or putting things off until you "are married
and settled? Do you often have a sense that the intense feelings of
happiness and joy cannot really be experienced unless you "have someone
to share it with?" Do you just feel there is not enough time and other
necessary resources available to the single person to pursue
experiences that can bring true happiness?If the above resonates
in your gut, do not despair. The following tips will offer ways to help
you experience your present reality differently through changing
behavior that is based on those negative (false) beliefs. Essentially,
these tips will offer advice on how to live a joyful, fulfilling and
balanced single life, which will also assist you in achieving a
healthy, long- term, intimate relationship.· Seek self-fulfillment as an individual.Place
emphasis on being truly alive and experiencing the things that bring
you true pleasure. Do not let the feelings of peace and wonder slip
from your life as you wait to share (beautiful sunsets) and other gifts
of life with a future partner.Do not place your focus on
"getting there." Instead, learn to experience the journey of life. If
you can only see the goal of a relationship - marriage, home, children,
etc., you will not enjoy the experiences along life's way.A good
analogy for this is that of a person who bikes and sets (ie), a 40-mile
goal for the day. They plan and prepare and off they go. The trip
consists of thoughts about getting there, watching for problems in the
road ahead, measuring the distance and looking forward to the sense of
relief and accomplishment when the goal is met.What about the
sensory experiences missed along the way? This biker will not see the
way the sun is reflecting on the river. They will not hear the sounds
of the birds and other wildlife in the parallel world around them. The
smells of fresh vegetation, moist soil and spring-drenched air will not
reach their awareness. It is doubtful their mind will trip and play
with thoughts of other (perhaps childhood) days like this.In other words, they will not be IN the experience, just racing through it, and missing the magic available all around them.· Do not put off important life decisions while waiting for that special someone.If
your desire is to own your own home, work towards achieving this now.
Yes, it may be smaller than if you had a partner to share it with. Your
list of must-haves with this first home may be different (as yours
alone) than they would be if you were looking for a family. When that
time comes, you can make the decision to remain there for a time, or
sell/rent out your first place. In the meantime, you will have an
investment that you can make into something that meets your needs now
for comfortable and secure living. It will add stability and be a
wonderful help at tax time.If you are thinking about making a career change or going back to school for a degree, there is no better time than now.Yes,
this may involve re-working priorities, moving, giving up some income,
etc. If this is something you have decided you want for your life,
delaying it until you are settled in a relationship may make it
impossible to achieve. Make that move now. Do not let this time in your
life be placed on hold as you wait for things to happen in your life,
instead of working to make them become reality.· Pamper yourselfDo nice things for yourself now that you have been putting off until?Go
ahead and take that trip to the exotic place you have always wanted to
visit. You can return there someday with your special someone.Make
it a habit to set the table for your dinner (for one). Use nice china
and candles. Treat yourself as deserving of the things couples
routinely provide to themselves as a unit. Ask yourself, am I less
deserving because I am single?Put care and love into how you
decorate your home. It does not have to cost a lot of money or become
another chore to accomplish this. Make it a comfortable nest and
retreat from the world. You and your future mate can decide together
what to keep, change or add to.* Make a plan, not excusesMake
time for the things that matter. Do not let your job or other
responsibilities take over your life. Set those priorities. Set limits
on work and other functional tasks. We often cite work as our best
excuse for not attending to our other needs and wants.
This may mean making less money or not moving up as fast in the
organization.Without balance, there will be deficits in the emotional, spiritual, and social and leisure areas of your life.
Write down your must haves.Take time out each day for unwinding and relaxation.
Keep a weekly inventory of how you are doing and make adjustments as necessary.Learn
how to productively "waste time". Turn off the blackberry and TV. Spend
time alone with your thoughts. Reflect on your feelings and your life.This
is the season for new beginnings. Let this spring be your time for
learning how to be truly happy and at peace within yourself. Immerse
your senses in the many joys that the world around you has to offer.
Don't shut out the beauty and happiness that is available to everyone,
regardless of their relationship status. |
|
|